7. Nov, 2019

Ros's November letter

Greetings from Ros

In recent months life has been up & down for me with all kinds of mixed emotions.  There’s been the excitement of finally moving into the Manse.  But there’s been the disappointment of yet another health issue, just when I thought all of that was behind me.  There’s been the frustration of constantly feeling the energy drain as a consequence of a severe vitamin D deficiency.  There’s been the fun of getting out & about in the fresh air on doctor’s orders.  There’s been the need to take care in pacing activities so as not to cause coming to a standstill. There’s been the joy of having to stop & be still to spend time with God.  So there have been advantages to emerge from the difficulties.

Sometimes things leave us with mixed emotions.  Last month I went into Derby to see the Knife Angel whilst it was outside Derby Cathedral.  Looking at the sculpture was very uncomfortable & challenging.  There was a sense of amazement at the way so many, 10,000, knives had been put together to form an angel.  I couldn’t say it was beautiful but it certainly moved me, especially seeing that some of the knives had been engraved with the names of victims of knife crime.  All of the knives that had been used had been handed in during a knife amnesty held throughout the country a number of years ago.  The whole sculpture was a reminder of the issue of knife crime & the loss of life caused by knives. On the day I went to see the angel there were further deaths caused by someone wielding a knife reported on the news. It certainly gave me plenty of food for thought.  I was glad to be able to go into the Cathedral for some space to reflect & pray.

In the Bible we find a number of people who experienced mixed emotions.  Elijah was one of those.  He had the amazing experience of seeing God’s amazing victory over the prophets of Baal.  But this was mixed up with the despair of having a price on his head & the loneliness of feeling all alone.  But God took care of his physical needs for rest & food & led him to a cave where he was to meet with God.  This has been my desire in the midst of the mixed emotions of recent months.  It is in allowing God to break into all the circumstances of life that we find him drawing us closer to him as we make new discoveries about him.  Elijah didn’t encounter God in the wind, fire or earthquake but in the still small voice.  Life may feel as if it is full of the noise & drama of the earthquake, wind & fire but we still need to listen out for God’s quiet voice.                   Love,  Ros

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